Guard Wife Juggles Life in Two Worlds

By Danette Hayes

Meet Sarah Klaper. She’s the wife of Maj. Jack Erwin, the mother of two daughters, ages eight and five, and a full-time instructor of legal writing at DePaul University College of Law in Chicago. Sarah and Jack have been married for 14 years and Jack, who is in Afghanistan with the National Guard, is on his second deployment since September 2001.

Sarah practiced public interest law in the area of Illinois local government before teaching legal writing. Jack, when he's not deployed, is an eighth grade teacher who works with Special Education students.

Sarah said the hardest part of this deployment has been the separation.  “Although modes of communication with military personnel have greatly improved in the past 60 years, being apart is still being apart,” she said. “My husband misses us all desperately although he is deeply committed to this country, his mission, and his fellow soldiers.”

Their relationship as a married couple has effectively been put on hold for the past year, she said. “I have had to do everything to maintain our house, our children, and our lives while maintaining my own career and supporting my husband in whatever he needs.” She is bothered that their daughters will not grow up with their father as a constant presence in their lives and that Jack will come back to two entirely different little girls who are at different developmental stages than when he left.  She is also worried about the stress that reintegration will place on their entire family when Jack returns.

Sarah joined BSF to be involved with a community of individuals who understand the service and sacrifices made by her husband, her family and herself, she said. National Guard families are inherently disconnected from one another, unlike families located on or near a military base, she said. National Guard service places unique demands on the service members and their families that are generally overlooked by the public, the press and many government officials. Sarah said that Blue Star Families recognizes these issues, provides helpful information to her and helps to bring important issues to the forefront of the American consciousness. 

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