How Civilians Can Step Up to Support Military Families Beyond “Thank You”

Published: February 24, 2025

By Jillian Johnson

Over 19 years ago, when my husband first joined the military, we were often approached by people who would thank him for his service whenever they saw him in uniform or when he pulled out his ID for a military discount. The gestures were always appreciated, but they were also the only real form of “support” we received from our civilian community at that time. Aside from “thank yous” and random conversations struck up in public about what military life was like, no one really asked what we needed to feel supported, let alone acknowledged the challenges we faced as a military family.

Supporting military families goes beyond a simple ‘thank you for your service.’ It’s about understanding the challenges we face and offering help in meaningful ways. The emotional strain of long deployments, the constant uprooting of our lives, and the isolation that often came with these are rarely fully understood or addressed. However, our civilian supporters have the power to change this.

Civilians are the lifeline that helps military families connect and thrive in our communities. You know and understand the communities that we move to and can help us integrate into them without feelings of loneliness and isolation. As civilians, there are so many things you can do to show military families your appreciation that will make more of a difference than you realize.

Here are a few practical ways civilians can do their part to support military families:

Reach Out and Offer Your Time

Military families experience long deployments and frequent relocations. These circumstances are often isolating and are a struggle to handle alone. A simple gesture like a dinner invite, hosting a barbeque, or offering to watch the kids for appointments can make a world of difference.

Ask Questions

I love when my friends ask me about military life because I appreciate that they want to understand. I am mindful about my answers, but ultimately, asking questions is the best way to seek knowledge about someone’s personal experience. Not everyone’s military life experience is exactly the same. Some of us PCS more than others, others deploy or are gone more often than others, etc. Asking questions can help you support military families better based on their own individual needs rather than based on a blanket understanding of military life.

Offer Tangible Support

While ‘thank you for your service’ is always kind, other gestures like offering a discount at local businesses or hosting a community event honoring military families can go a long way in making us feel valued and supported. Check out this list for more ideas on how you can offer tangible support to military families.

Volunteer Your Time

Volunteering your time is a great way to not only support, but learn about military families. By offering your help, whether it’s through local events, helping with childcare, or assisting at military family centers, you’ll gain a deeper understanding of what military life is like and the challenges that we face. Some great places to volunteer are:

    • Military-impacted schools
    • Veterans organizations
    • Youth sports
    • Local Veterans homes and hospitals
    • The American Red Cross
    • Nonprofit organizations, like Blue Star Families and the USO

Living near a local Blue Star Families Chapter opens up even more volunteer opportunities! Check out this map to see if you are close to a Chapter and get in touch with the Chapter director to get started.

Support Military Spouse Employment Initiatives

Military spouses continue to face a staggering unemployment rate of over 20%, a challenge that persists despite efforts to create more flexible employment solutions. The unpredictable nature of military life makes it difficult for spouses to hold down stable careers. Even when remote work options are available, the reality is that many military spouses are still underemployed or forced to take on jobs that don’t fully utilize their education and skills. Local businesses, state agencies, and organizations can help address these challenges by hiring military spouses, and friends and neighbors can help spouses by introducing them to people they may know in their professional networks. Building connections within the community and offering job referrals can open doors to opportunities that might otherwise be inaccessible. Additionally, local businesses can offer flexible work schedules or remote work options to accommodate the unique challenges military spouses face, such as relocation and deployment. These and more are ways that businesses can adopt the 4+1 Commitment to address the challenges of military spouse employment. Learn more about the 4+1 Commitment here.

Donate to the Cause

Making a recurring or one-time monetary contribution to Blue Star Families will go a long way to ensuring that we can continue to support military families and help them thrive. Your generous donation helps fund programs that provide critical resources like food assistance, career support, outdoor programs, and mental health services to military families who need them most. Help us continue our work by donating here.

At Blue Star Families, we cannot do what we do without our civilian supporters. With your help, we can create a network of support that makes a difference. It’s not just about saying “thank you for your service,” it’s about taking action and showing up for military families when they need it most. Join us and do your part in making a lasting impact today.

 

 

 

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